Tinderella (An Online Dating Rant)

As women moved up in the ranks of the business world, men suffered a severe loss of power. Women seem more intimidating, and our standards couldn’t be set higher. We’re slowly learning what we deserve and not lowering the bar for any man. But that is exactly what scares them all away. Men have always been the more powerful gender, while women held the nurturing card. These days, however, the roles seem to be switching. It’s more acceptable for women to be in high-ranks of major companies, while it’s even more acceptable for men to feel more sensitive and less aggressive.

In the dating world today, it’s completely normal to create an online dating profile. In fact, it’s almost necessary if you’re searching for companionship. If you’re like me and aren’t into the whole online dating scene, I recommend seeking companionship in a pet, or maybe a pillow, because the only action you’re going to get is a late-night spoon session from an inanimate object or a pet that loves you by default because you feed it. It is statistically proven that more than 50% of people meet their partners from an online dating site, but most of the women I’m friends with have encountered many dating-site men just looking for an easy lay. A lot of men use online sites just to do less work and get more out of it, specifically sex. Tinder is the easiest example of this. The shamelessly superficial smartphone app allows you to swipe someone to the right if you think they’re hot and swipe to the left if they’re found less-than-fortunate looking. If two people find each other attractive, it’s a match and from there you can start messaging one another. While I stayed in Dallas with my friend, we decided to give this app a good ol’ college try. Our results left us with little hope for the dating world and an empty bottle of vodka.

I matched to dozens of men, and one out of 20 would message me first. Some never messaged at all and I refused to message them first since Tinder did most of the work. You find me attractive, I find you attractive. Now that we know this, you should find it even easier to initiate something here. Not many guys comprehended this concept. For the handful that did message me, it’s another story entirely. Most would start the conversation with an intriguing “Hey” and if they wanted to be even MORE appealing, they’d say “Hey what’s up.” There was also the needle-in-the-haystack guy that would ignite our conversation with something different—something a bit more personal, funny, or anything worth responding to. However, the conversations would eventually dwindle into a pool of one-worded responses on their end and a feeling of inadequacy on mine. Some of these guys, after only talking for less than an hour, would want to “meet up” with me, usually somewhere involving alcohol. Is this what dating has become? No dinner, just skip straight to drinking so the guy can cross his fingers in hopes that the woman gets belligerent enough to have sex with him for one night? The pit in my stomach rolls at the thought of this becoming the new thing. Needless to say, Tinderella certainly did NOT find her Prince Charming.

I’m not ranting simply about men. Women are a strong problem in this equation as well. My theory is that men are behaving this way because us women allow it. Many girls probably get drunk and screw the first guy they see. That’s fine and all, but men now realize that they don’t need to put in a lot of work and an even less amount of money before they can get into bed with a woman. Nor my friend or I were asked out to dinner via Tinder—just to a bar to get a drink or to some sketchy parties in the middle of nowhere. Some guys even gave us THEIR number and demanded us to call them and see when we can “hang out.”

Maybe it will blow over in the next few years. Or maybe it’s this college, young, age group and the dating scene is legitimately transitioning into a sex-crazed e-world where the women do all the labor and almost have to be aggressive. Until this is sorted, ladies, at least we have vodka to numb the pain of dating reality.