The 7 Funniest Accounts on Twitter

Not to toot my own horn, but I (@lacey_the_lion) maintain quite a presence on my favorite social networking site, Twitter.

The 356 accounts I follow are a giant mixture of my friends, my family, news sources, celebrities, bands, athletes, and humor accounts. I recently cleared out most of my humor-based accounts in order to make my account more “professional,” but I retained a few of my irresistible favorites:

1. emre (@chanelpuke) is my guilty pleasure Twitter account. There are thousands upon thousands of users like this on the site, specializing in random, dramatic blurbs and odd imagery. I once followed twenty or more of these accounts, but emre is the only one I still follow. This user, from her Miley Cyrus profile picture to her dislike of punctuation, is a hot mess and might be the most relatable, amusing account for angst-y girls.

Key Tweet: *enters with a bad powerpoint animation effect* hello

The picture emre uses on her profile. Oh, Miley Cyrus.

2. Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) is exactly what you think it is. I don’t know about you, but I love the sitcom Seinfeld. Therefore, I think these tweets are ingenious. The humor is dry and requires knowledge of the main Seinfeld characters, but the tweets create a brand new episode of Seinfeld in the reader’s head. Who doesn’t want the voices of Jerry, George, Elaine, Kramer, and Newman constantly in his or her head?

Key Tweet: Elaine’s Republican boyfriend says “Thanks a lot, Obama,” whenever something bad happens. Kramer claims to have created ChristianMingle.

3. The Fake Lantern (@TheFakeLantern) is “The Fake Student Voice of The Ohio State University.” If you don’t go to OSU, The Lantern is the student-run, campus-wide newspaper/news source. So, The Fake Lantern is the snippy, sarcastic little Twitter brother. TFL often has an immediate response to tweets by The Lantern, and the funniest aspect of all may be that I get more of my campus news from TFL than the actual Lantern account.

Key Tweet: Weird Roommate Already Corrects Anyone, Everyone Who Calls It The SEL

4. (A three-way tie between) Adam Devine (@ADAMDEVINE), Blake Anderson (@UncleBlazer), and Anders Holm (@ders808), otherwise known as the main characters of Comedy Central’s Workaholics. If you’ve never seen this television show, I would recommend watching an episode to become acquainted with these three comedians. Otherwise, you don’t have to know anything about Workaholics to follow these accounts! Each of these accounts provide hilarity with tweets about food, sports, music, and other random, inappropriate things that comics in their twenties talk about.

Key Tweet (from @ADAMDEVINE): I am a root beer flavored person.

The boys.

5. The various Bill Nye parody accounts (@Bill_nye_tho_II is my favorite, although he is not very active) are a student’s dream come true. The premise? Bill Nye provides you with random science facts in a very colorful way. I would be lying if I said I didn’t gain new facts from these tweets, and I would also be lying if I said these tweets were family-friendly. These accounts ran rapid last fall and have settled, but I still return to this account when I need a good, slightly immoral laugh.

Key Tweet: To all my —— who gettin real faded tn in the name of science I want y’all to rep Nikola tesla and the alternating current for me respect

6. Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney), the drummer for The Black Keys, made quite a national name for himself a month ago. By participating in “Twitter beef” with Justin Bieber and subsequently turning his account into a parody Bieber account, he gained my respect and lost thousands of followers. His account is now back to normal and is as comical as ever, but his days as Justin Bieber will never be forgotten. His responses to haters are some of my favorite tweets of all time.

Key Tweet: Diet coke shirts. The club is hot.

The tweet that started the feud.

7. Dogs doing things (@dogsdoingthings)’s tweets make absolutely no sense. So why, I ask, are the tweets so funny? The tweets appear to be profound and meaningful and are always perfectly punctuated. However, they are constructed of random references from history, film, music, literature, etc., and, well, canines doing things that we all know they can’t. It is quite difficult to imagine statements as haphazard as the tweets produced by this account, but you’ll love reading them.

Key Tweet: Dogs indicating three crucified figures atop a distant hill, noting, “You, me, and Dupree.”

Follow these accounts for a good laugh. And if you don’t have a Twitter, make one before Facebook dies.