The Perils of Social Networking

How many friends do you have?  The question might seem simple, but the answer is telling.  Maybe you respond with a quick “567”, the number on your Facebook profile page.  Maybe it’s “181”, your followers on twitter.  Or maybe you think of the people who you talk with on a daily basis, the people you know best.  The problem is, the distinction between weak and strong ties is growing blurry.  Users of social networking sites are spending time interacting with people they might never interact with in daily life.  While these interactions are simple and carried out on a broader scale than would ever be possible with face-to-face interaction, they are losing their depth.  Friend’s birthday?  Write a post on her wall instead of taking her out for coffee.  No longer able to attend an event?  Just click a button that says “Not Attending,” or message the host a few hours before.  Curious about the lives of long-lost friends?  Scan your newsfeed.  The problem with this mentality is, it takes a certain amount of time to make meaningful connections or have worthwhile social interactions.  By broadening our reach, we’re losing the depth that a one-on-one, face-to-face conversation can hold.  When the conversation never stops though, taking the time to disconnect can seem to lead to feelings of missing out.

Photo from Flickr.com, by quicheisinsane

There’s also the problem of misrepresentation – who are these friends, really?  Electronic relationships make it easy for people to show only their best sides.  Spending hours going through photos of your friends from high school, the girl in your sorority, the guy in your fraternity or the kid who sits behind you in math can yield only misery because it will inevitably lead to comparison. Experts say this may lead to feelings of isolation and a decrease in confidence.

Finally, we are losing privacy and solitude.  Though at first this may seem like a good thing – it means we’re more connected, right? – on closer examination it could be extremely detrimental. The ability to gather yourself into a single point, to turn off your electronic devices and truly give thought to the questions that matter, to listen to yourself, is an ability I believe is overlooked by many, especially as dependency on social networking sites grows.  How else can you work towards the self-knowledge necessary for a fulfilling life?  How else can you give due thought to what you were taught as a child, or figure out what will make you happy?  In so fast-paced a society, it can be difficult to find a balance that will allow for this solitude.  I’m not advocating the deactivation of all Facebook pages, or the boycotting of twitter, but I do think it’s important to power-off every once in awhile.

A simple rule to help you avoid these problems is to only build social networks with people you would interact with in daily life.  This, in combination with minimizing your time on the web, should help you maintain both breadth and depth in your relationships and still make use of social networking sites as a tool.