First Day Paranoia - Making Friends with a Serial Killer

“Don’t worry,” said my mom, the woman who had warned me for the duration of my childhood to stay away from strangers, especially those who seem particularly nice or offer you candy, “I’m sure your roommate will be a great kid.”  When I arrived at Gettysburg, my roommate greeted me with a welcoming smile and a firm handshake.  He even asked if I wanted some Sour Patch.  That’s when I started thinking, “What’s stopping him from smothering me in my sleep with my own pillow?”  I’m expected to share my personal space with this guy without so much as a simple background check?  Of course, I did the obligatory Google name search and friended him on Facebook, but there’s only so much you can tell about a person by stalking their timeline.  I’d heard enough horror stories from older friends who went off to school and clashed with their roommates – girls waging psychological warfare, guys getting into fistfights, one freshman waking up in the middle of the night with a hot iron held over her face – nothing particularly fear-evoking, but conflicts I’d like to avoid nonetheless.

At some point during my mental gymnastics routine, between taking inventory of all the sharp items in our room and stealing glances at my roommate to spot any telltale tattoos, I realized something that should have been evident from the second I walked in the door.  He’s got all the same concerns as me.  He, too, just wants to socialize and be liked.  He has his own worries about leaving his family and friends, and starting a new life with new people and new responsibilities.

The truth is, the prospect of living away from home for months at a time is terrifying for some students, notwithstanding the fact that they may have some reservations about sharing their personal space with a stranger.  Not every freshman is new to the game, though.  Agnes, a prospective foreign affairs major in the class of 2016, is a native of Sweden who studied at a boarding school in neighboring Norway before coming to Gettysburg.  “I struggled finding my place,” Agnes commented, “but I’m used to getting to know new people.”  Even though she is nearly 4000 miles from the fjord-filled land she calls home, Agnes is experienced in the art of rooming, and thus her transition from secondary school to college was relatively pain-free.

First impressions are irreversible, and nobody wants a bad introduction to mar their relationship with the person they have to live with for the next year.  Give him or her the benefit of the doubt – they may seem “off,” but they are likely as overwhelmed as you are with the deluge of information that comes with college life.  So even if you are an introvert by nature, offer a kind gesture, strike up a personal conversation, or even just return their smile.  You may just make their year.