How Sitters Can Update Parents Without Feeling Micromanaged

There is a fine line for how sitters can update parents without feeling micromanaged. After all, each family has different expectations or needs, especially if there are health concerns at play. It’s easy for both sides to accidentally cross it and make the other feel suffocated at work. Wanting updates about your children is only natural, but it’s important you don’t consistently urge your sitter for them. Remember, they’re also doing their job of taking care of your children, so constant updates aren’t the easiest. On the flip side, you may not want to feel micromanaged by your sitter if they send you text after text asking questions or other concerns.

Micromanagement can cause extreme discomfort, as you wouldn’t want to do something wrong. That is never a good work environment, so different forms of updates are great to keep in mind.

via Pexels

Make Priorities Clear

Different families have different priorities when it comes to what kind of updates they would like and how often. If your sitter has worked with other families, they may be used to doing something different than what you would prefer. Are you interested in hourly or small updates, such as every time your child eats and sleeps, or do you only want major updates? Do both parents want these updates, or only one? You might not want any updates at all, assuming no news is good news! It is also completely okay to start off wanting something and change your mind a few weeks in, as you settle in and have more trust in your babysitter. If your priorities change, communicate those to your sitter so neither of you feels micromanaged.

If you do want hourly updates, set your expectations so that you do not have to micromanage and text your sitter every hour if they fail to provide you with an update. Have them understand what you want from them so they can reach out to you with the updates. Don’t panic if they are a few minutes late: they may be in the middle of trying to set your child down for a nap!

If you’re more interested in only major updates, getting text after text can be overwhelming, especially if you are in the middle of an important meeting or trying to enjoy your night out.

Consider Different Forms of Communication

Sitters do not have to use texts to update you. Many parents use a log book where the sitters can provide details, whether it’s those hourly updates you can check or an overall summary of the day, including the children’s overall moods, how much they ate, and if or when they had naptime, so that you can prepare for the rest of the day. When you use a log book, you don’t have to get text notifications, and instead expect those only in emergencies or if the sitter has an important question. This allows you both to go about your days without that feeling of being micromanaged. You can come home and read what they wrote while your sitter writes it all on their own time.

You can use a physical log book, such as a basic notebook, or even use electronic methods, such as a shared Google Doc or a note on your phone. Sometimes, going old school and using the notebook is helpful so that your sitters can write things down as they pass by it on the counter, and you can do the same when you want to read through it.

Supporting independence in your babysitters will prevent you from feeling micromanaged. Having sitters for your children only works if you trust them to do what you hired them to do. You need to urge them to work independently without your input, updates aside. Your sitter needs to grow in their role and learn what works best for not only your children, but your family in general. This is why a log book can work well so that you can both go about your day as independent professionals.

Remain Calm

If you ever have concerns about your sitter’s babysitting style or your children, do not bombard them with questions. Bring up your concerns in a calm and collected manner, preferably in person or over a phone call. It is difficult to hear tone in text, and situations may escalate in a way they wouldn’t in person, when each person can explain their side of any situation. This way, any concerns about updates can be spoken about thoroughly.

Updates are only natural when it comes to your children, but you never want to feel micromanaged when you are going about your day. Keep communication open and clear, and take some time to develop the methods that work best for you and your family. Let each other breathe to prevent that micromanaged or helicopter feeling.