What To Do If You Hate Your Roommate

By Brittany Loeffler on February 16, 2018

It’s impossible to get along with everyone in life. This includes your roommate. Sometimes we are paired with a random roommate or we decide to room with a friend. No matter what the situation, you may find out after a few weeks of living together that you hate your roommate.

It isn’t uncommon to hate your roommate. Depending on both of your interests and lifestyles, you may not be the best match. However, most of the time you just have to stick it out. Here are some things to do if you hate your roommate.

nice, always be nice, roommate, life lesson

via Pixabay

Always Be Nice

If you hate your roommate, you can gain some valuable life lessons. The first is to always be nice. It may be hard to be nice to someone you despise, but it’s important to always be nice.

Now, this doesn’t mean that you should make them dinner every night or do their chores for them. It does mean that you shouldn’t be rude or ignore your roommate.

You’ll have to deal with unpleasant people in life, whether it is at work, a restaurant, or whenever. This is a great moment to practice being nice to everyone.

Find Common Ground

Chances are, you and your roommate have at least one thing in common. Finding something that you two have in common can ease some of the tension in the house. Maybe it’s a movie or television show. It could even be a favorite restaurant or snack. Whatever it may be, work on building a relationship from that.

This will give you and your roommate something to talk about at times. Eventually, you may even start to like your roommate if you two start hanging out.

boundaries, roommate agreement, roommate, hate your roommate

via Pixabay

Create Boundaries

Even if you don’t hate your roommate, it’s important to create boundaries in the house. The best way to do this is to create and sign a roommate agreement. This is a document that lists all of the rules you both must follow.

Some things to consider are quiet hours, chores, having friends over or parties, and how to split utility costs. If you live in a dorm, file the agreement with your Resident’s Assistant so they can hold you accountable for following the agreement. You can always go back and amend the agreement if unforeseen issues come up.

Have a Conversation

The best way to handle roommate situation is to communicate. Be honest with your roommate about the issues you have living with them. They may not even be aware that they are doing things to upset you. This does not mean you can attack your roommate and blame them for certain things. This is a way to maybe work out your differences and come to an agreement.

own space, privacy, roommate, hate your roommate

via Pixabay

Create Your Own Space

If you hate your roommate, you won’t want to spend a lot of time with them. If you are living in a house or apartment and have your own bedroom, make it your own space. It is a space where your roommate cannot come in. You can make it yours however you wish. Decorate it. Keep it clean or messy. It doesn’t matter, as long as you feel comfortable in it.

If you live in a dorm and have to share a room with your roommate, find a place outside of the dorm to make your own. This should be a place where you feel comfortable and can relax. Maybe it’s a coffee shop on campus, a tree in the courtyard you like to sit under, or a quiet corner of the library. Any place to escape a tense situation.

Be Respectful

Being respectful is different than being nice. Nobody likes to live in a hostile environment. It has an effect on your mental health and happiness when you live in a tense home. Make sure to show your roommate respect and hopefully they will do the same to you.

Being respectful means saying “hi” when you walk into the room or keeping them updated on when you are having friends over. It means keeping the common areas clean and doing your dishes.

Consider Moving Out

Not everyone can be as level-headed as you. If your roommate situation doesn’t let up after trying all of the things above, you may want to consider moving out. If you are renting an apartment, talk to your landlord about subletting your room to someone else. If you live in a dorm, talk to your RA about possibly switching rooms or buildings.

If you hate your roommate, there are many options on how to still live a happy and respectful life. Always be nice and respectful towards your roommate. Try to have a conversation about how you are feeling and create boundaries for the two of you. If things don’t let up, you can always try to move out and find a better roommate.

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