It's All About the Memories: Beyond the Burgers and Hot Dogs

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As a child, teen, and previous twentysomething, I used to feel sorry for myself that I did not have a group of girlfriends, close family members, or loving lover to celebrate Memorial Day with. I envied those who could unwind, relax, and have fun on the unofficial first day of summer at the Jersey Shore. I whined that I never have fun on Memorial Day. However, the essence and purpose of Memorial Day were not appreciated or acknowledged until I stand alive as a 30-year-old woman who could have died several times if it was my time.

My group therapy session ended in a tragic manner. A fellow community member passed away unexpectedly in the midst of a Memorial Day BBQ. I went to my next group [Women's Group] where sirens and police cars were outside. Once the community was informed about her death, my thoughts were, “The clients, especially the vulnerable — troubled — and traumatized women, are unnecessarily blaming themselves” and, “They will feel worse about life now that a celebration turned into chaos.”

Thoughts automatically were community minded as opposed to internal selfishness. As a Nutrition Counselor, I could not help but empathize with those that associate food with fear, panic, trauma, and tragedy due to this event and others throughout his or her lifespan development.

Life is too short to be unappreciative and miserable. The purpose of holidays such as Memorial Day are easily lost when things are not put into perspective. Memories must be honored for veterans and quotidian citizens alike. The tragic and unfair memories must be forgiven and released for wellness within the mind, body, heart, and spirit. It does not matter if burgers and hot dogs are consumed. It does not matter if the weather is “beach, boardwalk, and BBQ friendly.”

It does not matter whether or not your patriotic selfies are deemed “popular.” It does not matter what businesses have Memorial Day sales. It does not matter if fireworks happen to be in the sky. It does not matter if your weekend is filled with business or pleasure. It is a day to remember the good, bad, and indifferent experiences within life and press forward.

There are military personnel of various demographics and generations inflicted with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder as we speak. We must honor those that combat on land, in flight, or in water and validate their honor by living everyday life!