5 Qualities That Make James Bond The Ultimate Ladies Man

Doesn’t it piss you off how easily 007 pulls the ladies?  Over the span of 22 films, James Bond has a confirmed 52 “women under his belt” (pun intended).  How does he continuously get away with it?  Shouldn’t women be wary since whoever he sleeps with is killed before the next scene even starts?  Is that part of his game?

Here are my 5 reasons why women can’t keep their hands off the British super spy.

1. He is a British super spy.

Without assuming too much about the scenarios through which Bond meets these women, I can at least deduce that many of them recognize his name.  His reputation proceeds him, as many bad guys and love interests have told him.  He is never secretive about his identity, very much in cahoots with common spy practices, but is instead forthcoming with his name.  Or else, how could the famous “Bond, James Bond” become such a recognizable assertion in our culture.

2. Women–people in general for that matter–want what they can’t have.

Every Bond movie ends with our hero and his lady sailing off into the sunset or lounging back in a lovers’ embrace.  What’s common regarding all these seemingly happy endings?  Despite 007′s appearance, and in some films his articulation of the fact, that he is no longer in the spy business and is dropping that part of his life for her, next year we find ourselves watching him go after another bad guy and “falling in love” yet again.  It’s the forbidden fruit quality.  Apparently no woman, especially not any sex-deprived henchwomen, can resist Bond’s unattainable quality.

3. He is insistent and physically engaging.

As this clip from FOX’s Family Guy will illustrate, James Bond often errs on the side of assertiveness.  So much so that plenty of bloggers, movie critics, and women’s rights activists have attacked the character for being inappropriate and misogynistic.  The fact of the matter is Bond is a man who gets things done.  He makes his moves, on missions and off, like he already knows the outcome.  Experience will tell you the first move is essential, yet it “puts you out there” to get rejected.  007 knows (as the Family Guy clip parodies, but also reveals) that he will not and cannot get rejected.  He is the poster boy for the “If you want something, take it” adage.

4. He is above all, supremely confident.

Pick-up advisers all over the world preach this quality.  Although 007 walks, talks, and acts with the swagger of someone who has a license to kill, he never explicitly brags about his awesomeness to the ladies.  This quiet confidence is supremely beneficial in situations like the one at hand.  If you’re uncertain, she’s going to be uncertain.  Like I said in #3, Bond is never uncertain.  He doesn’t act like a jerk or brag about how many people he has killed or even about how much he makes a year before taxes.

5. He has acquired talents beyond being a secret agent.

Let’s just come out and say it.  Every Bond since Sean Connery has been a good-looking guy.  Expensive clothes, smooth talking, and unmatched wit just serve to improve what’s already there.  James Bond can dance, escape complex and otherwise dire situations, speak a boatload of languages, and manage to never lose his charm or life in the process.  These women know that even though trouble is always afoot with him, there’s nothing 007 can’t handle.

Note: All this could possibly go to your head, so my advice is to watch some Archer before using these 5 in the real world.  Then, hopefully, you’ll know where to draw the line.