Crushing On Your Roommate's Sibling

By Allie Mitchell on May 11, 2016

Your roommate in college, whether you are a freshman or a graduating senior, is someone that is going to impact your life whether you want them to or not. They can be your best friend or just someone you say ‘hi and bye’ to.

Regardless of your relationship status with your roommate you may end up meeting their family and vice versa. This could happen on move-in day or on a random occasion when you aren’t expecting it.

Meeting your roommates’ families isn’t such a big deal in hindsight, but what you aren’t expecting is for them to have an overly attractive sibling. Of course they would never tell you up front “hey, I have a very attractive brother/sister.” So you have to deal with this yourself. First you deal with it internally; then you deal externally.

First things first, let’s break a few things down:

•Is this a pursuit-worthy crush or not?

•Do you and your roommate really get along well enough for you to pursue this?

•Do you like their family enough to even pursue this?

Now that you have thought all of these things through, you can go one of two ways. If you have decided against said crush, then you can go on with your life as normal; on the other hand, you may have decided to go forward with this attraction you have.

Tips to dealing with your sibling crush:

1. Make a conversation: I know speaking to someone you like is hard. Making coherent sentences can quite possibly be the hardest thing to do in that moment. Lucky for you, the one thing you both have in common is your roommate. Ask him/her about your roommate, ask them more about their family, ask them what they have planned for the rest of the day. Remember that they don’t really know you (aside from if your roommate has told them stuff about you) so a simple conversation can go a long way.

2. Talk to your roommate: I don’t mean go right up to your roommate and tell them you like their sibling, but learn a little bit more about them. This is when you need to be slightly good at the art of subtlety. Most siblings don’t want to know how badly you want their brother/sister. Then again, there are those roommates that will just set you up with their sibling, so honestly it just has to do with your roommate and of course your relationship with them

3. Exchange numbers: If they have the type of family that comes over a lot or even if (lucky you) their sibling goes to your school, make use of tip 1 and exchange numbers. Don’t freak out! This doesn’t have to mean anything. Millions of people exchange numbers and nothing comes of it. But, if you guys are starting out as friends first then exchanging numbers isn’t unheard of. Confidence is key in any type of relationship whether it be romantic relationships or friendships.

4. Hang out together: If you and your roommate are going out, ask them to invite their sibling out. Especially if you guys go to the same college. Ideally, not every sibling pair wants to go out to clubs together, but if they are close it could be fun. You already have a good relationship with your roommate, so if all goes up in smoke at least you have someone on your side.

Now that that is out of the way, here are a few things to steer clear of before anything is started:

•RELATIONSHIP ALERT!!!: Hopefully your roommate has spoken to you and told you about their sibling’s girlfriend/boyfriend, but if not, make sure you find this out before pretty much anything else. That does not mean you can’t have a friendly relationship with them and hang out together, but no one wants to be the ‘other person.’

•How they treat their family: Move-in day or throughout your experience with your roommate if you notice that their sibling is well … not so nice to their parents or even your roommate, you are going to have to think to yourself, “is this who I want to potentially meet my parents?”

•The company they keep: You’ve heard the old saying, “you are the company you keep.” This reigns true the majority of the time. You have to consider the type of person you want and what type of relationship you want to pursue. Don’t ever change yourself for anyone, no matter how much you like them!

At the end of the day, whether you are the shy type or the not-so-shy type, crushing on your roommate’s sibling can put just as much pressure on you as schoolwork. You have a million thoughts running through your head and you feel like you hyperventilate every time they are in the room.

Remember they are a person too and they could be going through the same inner turmoil as you are. Just keep in mind, they might have it more difficult than you — I mean your roommate is THEIR sibling. You are only living with your roommate temporally, they have them for LIFE.

By Allie Mitchell

Uloop Writer
23 | Georgia State Alumna || Biology Major| Seeking MPH after graduating| Aspiring writer| Lover of interesting conversations and funny people| Active reader of fiction"| Girlfriend to a wonderful marine

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